A few days ago, while I was watching reruns of old Friends episodes and eating chicken with so much hot sauce on it that each bite was total agony, I suddenly remembered the presence of two cringeworthy youtube videos that I made when I was living the life of a tragic, chubby Justin Bieber look-a-like. The first one consists of me (looking considerably more like a spaniel than I do now) lip-syncing to Cascada, and the second is just a really embarassing and fucked up stop motion animation I made with my cousin.  For some reason I haven’t deleted them, and for some reason I’m sharing them on my blog so that everyone can see that deep in my heart I’m a total geek. FuK tHe H8, MaN.

I’m not even going to try and come up with an excuse for this. All I remember is that my friend is sitting off-camera in hysterics, and that my brother tried to play agent and make me a youtube sensation. It’s safe to say that he failed, unless garnering the attention of several lurking pedophiles and h8ing latent homosexuals makes me a sensation. It’s worth giving the comments a read. I particularly enjoy my #ironic response to the hate – ‘my m8 madde me do it i aint gay!!! lol’ – and the fun years of emotional torment which it brings to mind. JOKES!

This is just confusing. I was fifteen when I made this. Most of my friends were out drinking Smirnoff Ice in public spaces, but I was…. doing shit like this. There’s a conflict here between totally childish, poor quality animation with a nonsensical story line (if you can call it a story line), and the complex psychological layers suggested by the shot of the drawing on the wall. Does Lizzy have daddy issues? Is the green man a manifestation of her suppressed anxieties about her relationship with her father? Or did I just want to fuck up a load of clay and animate it and play the Perfume soundtrack in the background because that’s what was on my ipod at the time? I was either really really dumb or an actual genius.

Read about other stuff that happens in my life, or maybe about sexy photography.

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